Is it me, or do they like their computer more?

Next to a cell phone, teens stay in touch with computers. The computer itself is a welcome gift but in lieu of that, additional gifts can include: Software, iPods, printers, Bluetooth devices and the most valuable of all….time.

How do you know as a parent when your teen's computer use is going too far? There is no easy litmus test here. If your teen loves to play online games, he may not be alone. However, if your teen seems to be sacrificing social opportunities or spending more than 25 hours a week in the online gaming arena, maybe something is wrong.

Today's teenager also has access to a variety of services available on the computer and over the Internet. Instead of using the telephone, they use instant messaging. They don't get their pictures printed at the corner drugstore anymore but upload digital pictures to MySpace and sharing them with friends and anyone else instantly. Even the ever-present radio or stereo have fallen out of vogue because the computer has much better sound and its attached woofer makes the room vibrate even more. Watching a movie on television has been replaced with playing a DVD on the computer. Teens may even do their homework and school projects on the computer.

Parenting Tips for using the Internet

• Keep computer in family area to better monitor your child's activity
  
• Regularly spend time online with your child to learn about his or her interests and activities
  
• Teach your child to end any experience online when he or she feels uncomfortable or scared by pressing the back key, logging off, and telling a trusted adult as soon as possible
  
• Establish an atmosphere of trust and understanding with your child by not blaming him or her for uncomfortable online experiences
  
• Discuss the difference between advertising and educational or entertaining content and show your child examples of each
  
• Establish strict rules for ordering products (and then monitor credit card bills)
  
• "Talk back'' to Internet Service Providers and content creators to let them know what you want and expect from them in keeping kids safe online

It seems that teenagers these days are hooked on the computer just as they were hooked on watching television just a decade ago. Whether they are logging into MySpace, downloading songs from iTunes, blogging, chatting with each other over IM, or spacing out surfing the Web, mounting evidence shows that teen computer use can in some cases be classified as either a compulsion or even an addiction.

Considering that many people get addicted to the Internet, parents should be able to recognize when their teen is developing a bad habit. The isolating, repetitive nature of computer work in general can be stunting in terms of development. In addition, parents should be concerned if their teens are not getting enough exercise, nutrition and sleep. 

Your plan also needs to include how much time you will allow for each activity and how many hours you are willing to allow per week. The Internet has become an unsafe place for teens in many respects, so you also might consider one of the software packages available that allow you to set parental controls similar to the parental controls which block certain TV programs. Be prepared for your teenager's question, "What do you want me to do instead?"

If all else fails, simply unplug the computer and put it away somewhere.

If you find yourself needing to use a computer or the internet, use a school's or your library's. It would be a great way to create some family “together time” and to get back to basics.

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Resources
Christina Botto
articlecity.com/articles/parenting/article_1261.shtml
parents.berkeley.edu/

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